Ask the Astrologers - Taking your Relationship to the Next Level

This month we’re excited to announce the Ask the Astrologers column, which will become a regular feature of this blog. On what will hopefully become a regular basis, we’ll be offering astrological insights into questions about relationships, money, career, family, and a variety of other topics as submitted by our readers.

Although names will be changed and birth data omitted (in order to preserve confidentiality), each column will feature actual questions submitted by readers.

We plan to share the column and combine insights whenever possible, because we do each offer a unique astrological perspective. And while we can’t guarantee that specific questions will be selected in any given month, we encourage you to submit them.

If you would like either of us (or both) to take a stab at your questions, please free free to submit them (along with the birth date, time and place of birth for each person) in the comments section of this article or email us here.

Although we won’t be able to respond to every question, we’ll select those that best suit the current astrological themes and post our responses here.

Taking your Relationship to the Next Level

This month Chrisalis addresses a reader’s problems in her relationship. The relationship is new enough that she doesn’t feel comfortable asserting her needs — for fear of scaring her partner off.

But she’s also frustrated with how slowly things are moving. She wonders whether she can expect to see things change or if might be better to cut and run before she becomes any more invested.

Hi my name is Helen. I have been with my partner Martin for 3 months now and we seem to be having a few problems and I am not sure how to deal with things the way they are. I really like this man and was wondering if you could give me any insight into how I could take this relationship forward.

Here is Chrisalis’ response:

Hello Helen, Nice to meet you and thank you for your question.

I imagine you have been going through quite a lot in the past 3 months and I hope my explanation of your charts can give you some clues as to why the dynamics of this relationship are perhaps testing you in ways you are not used to.

Martin looks to be quite a dynamic person and he has a lot of leadership traits as you also have yourself. For this reason I decided to start there… who is leading this relationship and is there any friction when deciding things or is there possibly a battle of wills going on.

The positions between both your suns and moons are in opposition which may give you the feeling you are both pulling in opposite directions. If you look at it this way… he has a Scorpio sun (his sense of self) you have a Taurean moon (your emotions). Both of these signs are fixed and do not want to be told what to do. He has an Aries moon (his emotions) and your sun is in Libra (your sense of self) again in opposition.

Sometimes it may seem you are looking into a mirror with each other and seeing the other person as the one in the wrong. My advice would be to look in the mirror… take a big smile… and see the trait he is projecting forward onto you and if it is pressing any of your buttons to come up with a way of deflecting or diverting these buttons…. After all you are a Libra – sign of balance and intellect.

You also both have Mercury in Scorpio in very close aspect to each other. Mercury is the planet of communication and intellect with this in Scorpio you should both be able to get to the bottom of something very quickly and come up with a solution.

Martin may also sometimes seem to be a man on a mission and at other times he looks like he is a lot of fun to be around. He would like things to be spontaneous, adventurous and yet he also seems to want a partner who can keep up with him mentally.

I’ve already covered the intellectual side and you also have your Venus in Sagittarius which is a great place for fun, spontaneity and adventure. His Mars is in Cancer and is retrograde so you may find it difficult to get him to open up emotionally. If there is an argument he may tend to withdraw and brood but this can sometimes be mistaken that he is actually taking stock of what is being discussed so give him some rope there.

If you jump in too quickly and push this man he will withdraw further (and it’s not just a “man thing” with him). His Venus is in Libra so he will like a woman to look good. Venus is also right at home in Libra so his attitude to love and beauty will be strong. Pluto is very close to his Venus and this would heighten any feelings he has in love. However, there is a square to his Venus from your Saturn and node and he may feel that sometimes you are trying to control him so be aware of this.

Over the course of the next few weeks Saturn will be transiting his Pluto. This will have the added effect that he may be quieter than usual with a lot of transformation going on the inside of him but possibly not showing on the outside. He will be thinking a great deal and you need to be aware that he may also be looking at life in a different way. To me he may not be ready for a serious relationship just yet. There seems to be some life lessons he has been learning the hard way for the past year or so.

I would not be taking this relationship forward for the time being. I would be learning more about him and also building boundaries (in a fun way) so there is groundwork down for any trouble spots that may hit off as I mentioned above between your suns and moons.

There are a few things to watch out for though in May. Firstly, Mercury, Venus and Mars will all come into alignment with your Mars and his Uranus. Things may seem a little erratic and out of sync. There may also be the possibility of arguments that come out of the blue and a need to bite your tongue if these get out of hand so they do not spiral into something more serious. Secondly, there is also a testing time for you both towards the end of May when Mercury and Venus go into opposition to both your natal Mercurys. Both of you may be feeling like you wish to say something but don’t quite know how to go about it at that time.

For the most part you both have good communication between you but there is also friction in the way you each approach life so take things slowly, don’t rush in and learn all you can as it sounds like you are both about to be tested on this quite soon and it is not going to be a walk in the park.

As always we’ll be offering astrological insights into questions submitted by our readers. Although names will be changed and birth data omitted (in order to preserve confidentiality), each column will feature actual questions submitted by readers. Click here for more information about us.

If you would like either of us (or both) to take a stab at your questions, please email us, or submit them (along with the birth date, time and place of birth for each person) right in the comments section below.

Remember, all comments are moderated, so we’ll be sure to edit out your birth data and any personal or identifying information before it’s publicly posted. If you have any concerns about this process feel free to message us here.

Although we won’t be able to respond to every question, we’ll select those that best suit the current astrological themes and post our responses here.

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